April 27th, 2013

Do I play the grown-up, friend or foe? I'm still waiting for the thank you for allowing me to go last night. Won't happen I'm sure. Not only do I never listen to her, I'm not fun to be around now either. I use to be her rock now I'm just a rock she sit on and leaves when done resting. I'm just another parent that isn't wanted. I'm a horrible mother. That's what she said. I finally stopped talking so now she can take a shower. What happened to "Mom I don't really care to listen right now I'm about to take a shower"? Or the shut up I heard many time you're boring me. I don't mind that. At least I knew what she was feeling and thinking. What about I can't wait to tell my mom what happened today. Now it's you never listen. You don't care. You are embarassing and I don't want to talk.
I know I didn't talk to my parents. They were too goodie goodie. If I told them I kissed a boy for the first time they'd ground me from going out with friends. I know this to be true. I, on the other hand, took the other approach by explaining how awful it was on my 1st kiss. How tremendously unprepared I was and naive. I set up her up for failure so it was good the first time. Although my first kiss was horrendous and spitifying, I still had my first kiss with Tim White. Outside a dirty hotel and casino in Las Vegas. A hurry up and kiss me before your mom sees kind of kiss. Grossed me out!
My daughter had the sense to wait til she was ready. No spit, no tongue (that I know of) and a simple peck. Now I worry about her first french. Not good, not good!!!!! I doubt the way we're going she'll tell me. I am her mother, her old best friend apparently, not her best friend not her favorite friend but her horrible mother.
I cry and cry! I mope around acting like a sad loser. I AM THE MOTHER!